My date turned out to be a total dud, but writer guy and I kept making eyes. After just one drink, I told the dude I was with that I had to go, put him in a cab, and then sent off a text to my second date, faking a headache. I marched back into the bar, sat down next to writer guy, and ordered myself a drink. He was taking notes for a play he was writing. We immediately bonded over our love of cheap beer, theater, and Johnny Cash.
For the next five hours, the booze flowed; we moved to another bar, split a plate of nachos, and then drunkenly fell into a cab together back to my apartment. We continued to see one another, but we were explicit about keeping things casual. So we laid down some ground rules: Until we got back to my place, of course. But I still had so much fun with him.
But, all good things come to an end. The passion that made our sex so good also meant we bickered regularly. So, I encouraged him to go after the other girl. We had one more night together and then we parted ways. I was a little bummed, because I really enjoyed the arrangement that Will and I had set up. But it also opened my eyes to one pretty amazing fact: Casual sex can be a lot of fun if both parties are on board.
Will knew that I was never going to change my mind when it came to a relationship with him, so he gracefully exited the situation instead of trying to change it. He knew casual sex was all that I could give at the moment, and when he started wanting something more, he walked away. The problem was me, and denial and maybe rom-coms.
Now I know I can reach out to him when I need something, be it help spackling a hole in the wall or an orgasm. Will showed me who he was from the beginning — a funny guy I felt comfortable with who made delicious chicken and dumplings. And lucky for me, I believed him.
After being raised on a steady diet of Disney movies, I expected to meet someone and fall passionately in love — but wound up collapsing under the pressures of modern dating.
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