I had grown up in a repressive small town and I was, at that time, looking to understand my own sexuality. I have never attached my self-worth to some idea of virginity or monogamy, but I still had not really explored many of my desires. I was meeting people living alternative lifestyles, and, as I got to know them, the stereotypes that I had built up started to come apart.
During this time I was in my mid-twenties, and I had an active sex life. Within seconds I had many responses, and after about a week of talking to a few people, I decided to meet a dentist at a hotel. Eventually, I chose to work as an escort exclusively. At that time, the reason I gave up my programming job was the free time. I was caring for a family member with a serious illness — the free time and money was a huge benefit.
However, I have always been concerned about how the social and legal issues may affect my future and the people that I love.
What kind of clients do you have? They tend to be doctors, lawyers, and businessmen looking to get away for a few hours in the middle of the day. Almost all of my clients are married.
I rarely got the opportunity to find out if the wives were ok with it, but I did see several couples, so I assume they were ok with it. I insist that they give me their full names and their place of work so that I can contact them there before we meet. I also check their identification when we meet. I also use verification companies, which assist escorts in verification of clients. For a fee, I can call in and they will tell me if the client has a history of giving the girls problems, where he works, and his full name.
If I was touring then there were extra expenses such as travel costs, hotels, and more advertising costs. That said, my choice to become an escort had a definite cost associated with it beyond the advertising, photos, and websites. I believe it is close to impossible to have a healthy relationship while working.
So it can be a lonely life. In addition, hiding my job from my friends and family proved to be difficult for many reasons. How do you think prostitution would change if it were legalised? Would you want your own child to become a prostitute? If the social and legal ramifications were gone, I think that being an escort might be like being a therapist I have never been a therapist, so my knowledge is obviously limited. Like most escorts, a therapist sells his or her skills by the hour.
A therapist also has to meet people for the first time not knowing who is walking in the door. Many have their own offices and work alone. In addition, the session is generally private and requires discretion.
If I had a child, I would hope that they would feel empowered, and have the opportunity to do whatever they desire to do, and that they would be in charge of their own sexuality. This job has its downsides, though, and can take a high toll on a person. So, like any parent, I would always want more for my child than I had for myself.
I feel that prostitution should be legal. Living in this hookup culture makes us a lot more relaxed about engaging in casual sex, bringing about a change in attitude toward relationships and monogamy. Grindr and Blued have enabled casual sex and relationships in the gay community worldwide. The reach of these apps is felt especially in countries where homosexuality is illegal. In India, Afghanistan and Pakistan, people looking for same-sex relationships existed in covert groups that used public restrooms, bathhouses and parks as pick-up locations.
Without having the freedom of LGBT-friendly governments and societies, not to mention gay bars to meet others, dating apps have opened up the opportunities and brought attention to the struggle for equality. So now, more people are meeting like-minded individuals for anonymous encounters. More of us are connecting with strangers to form short-term sexual flings. While this can put people at higher risk of something going awry — due to the lack of a screening process — are the apps to blame?
In the UK, unsettling figures regarding Tinder and Grindr related crimes show a sharp increase since In the past two years, more than offences have been linked to dating apps.
One downside to dating apps is the tendency for people to think with their bits, and not their brains — if you know what I mean. This is probably the time to point out that practising safe sex with strangers is always a good idea.
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